Unanswered Questions !!

Last night I indulged in a bed-time conversation with my friend, the talks were quite absorbing, scary and mysterious. We talked about things that extend beyond pragmatism, defy rationality, annihilate the theories of science and bamboozle the imagination of human kind.

We talked about ghosts and gods!!

We admired at our intellect and taunted at our imagination, being educated one’s (reasonably!) we at times also laughed at our foolishness to have started a topic that comprised of no worthy logic and was humanly insane.

Despite all this, we both continued only to start by openly admitting that we were adherent followers of science and being so sacredly scientific, we in-fact, questioned the very existence of wandering zombies and the honorable almighty.

Discussions alike always turn to be very interesting, they are engrossing because, you often end up asking yourself a barrage of questions, and while you scrub every part of your imagination to search for an answer, you feel to have reached the hilt and experience a vacuum to realize that the answers are yet to be discovered.

I could not sleep last night because I was caught in a web of thoughts, a volley of questions were being discovered, anxiety crept in as both of us realized that these would remain unanswered till we stay alive!!
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I look at things that surround me and admire at the visualization that exists, a mosquito, a flower, a cow and the flying bird!!

I hear myself say, that, to have created such antiquity, such specimens of existence and artifacts of matter would require talent and work beyond any man’s capacity and then I am quick to believe that there exists no man who would have such heightened imagination and hence, I reluctantly confirm the existence of someone, supreme, unknown, unheard but heralded enough to be known as the GOD!

Despite this realization, I am not much of a follower of a religion (am a Hindu-Brahmin), I sing no prayers daily and I do not remember when I last wore my sacred thread…But quite often I find myself swearing to the Lord, I turn to him in times of grief and desperation, I have this discomfort but I hesitantly confirm to the belief that there exists something supreme above us all who commands our lives and controls our living.

My friend, my partner in thoughts last night, had lost his father recently. The agony and pain that comes along with the tragedy reverberated in his voice as he spoke, though he wasn’t very overt about it.
I was quite young when I saw a dead body for the first time (Grandfather passed away in 1993, I have seen many deaths since then). I remember that post my grand father’s funeral (which I had attended amidst the innocence and fear that a boy of 8 years would have), I would be haunted with the scene of my granddad burning on the pyre. Let alone sleeping, closing my eyes would inadvertently bring back the images of the body burning and for close to a month I took my bath, with the soap burning my open eyes.

As my friend talked of the same feeling, I could only empathize. I questioned the idea of the ritual and my friends answer was the body is a rented shelter for the innate soul, burning the same, leads to its escapade as it wanders into a journey of its own.

Some are lucky enough to find another rented possession (human body) while some wander till eternity to be labeled as ghosts!!

I hate to recollect this, but its worth a mention, I had lost one of my friend quite recently – young, handsome, intelligent and immune – A person who had every reason to breathe and stay alive.

Until the moment of death he was cheerful and bustling with life, death just grabbed him by both its hands and we (my friends) would not do anything but mourn and helplessly cry.

I was to be by his side till his last journey of life, In police post mortem records, I was the, Last one to see him alive and the First one to see him dead

One standstill truck and a speeding bike, the crash happened in a second and a promising life died.

It all happened in an instance, it all ended at the same time!!

How could he leave us and go? Where has he gone? What has happened to him? Only if these could be answered…..

Death is so beyond control, that it takes away a person and his lifetime of associations along with him beyond himself, beyond all of us to an unknown undisclosed location in isolation and transverse.

The very fact that it all can end any moment, any time, irrespective of contexts and conditions is all the more spooky, bizarre, and scary.

As we discussed all this through out the night, we realized that the answers to all these things would come alive, only when we all die!!