Over the years, blame it on my upbringing or attribute it to the interpretations of my learning’s from Life, I have been by nature eternally demanding, zealous, and ambitious.
The irony however remains that though life did teach me how to dream, DREAM BIG, but in its attempt to teach me the means to realize the same - it failed!!!
With the kind of optimism that I bring in with myself, a man needs to be bitterly adamant, strictly stubborn, vehemently hardworking and purposefully industrious.
Alas, I acquaint with myself no such etymology!!!!
Now that I write all this, an even more appalling confession that I must make is despite knowing all this; my Dreams refuse to wade off!!
In fact they in-evidently haunt me and egoistically tease me with their unconquerable presence, embarrassingly reminding me of the standards that I need to arise and meet in life.
These reminders are uncalled for but unfortunately they are perennial, albeit uninvited but they do exist and they shall continue to do so till I stay alive!!!!!
I highlight this point now because the time now stands ripe before me to transform these groomed desires and ambitions into reality. Given that I have found an occupation for myself (arguably the best that I could manage!!) and am earning my money, all that I had wanted and had craved for in life had to materialize right before me.
The understanding that currency was the sole medium to all extravagancies was long imbibed within me and parallel to the same thought I have fought my way through to have found a job that is reasonably rewarding enabling me to earn all the money that I can.
Still, the Dreams stay alive unconquered and untarnished!!!
While I expressed this botheration to my father, (my best mate and my financier to date!!!) his explanation was equally eerie!! He questioned my Dreams and teased my ambitions terming them to be quixotic, romantic and unrealistic!!
Though he has never questioned my prodigy and I have always marveled at his encouragement through out all walks of my life, I still do not quite accept that whatever I have dreamt is beyond my capacity!!! For all the arguments that we have had recently, he demanded that I add a tinge of prudence to my materialistic expectations from life.
After a careful examination though, I have allowed my prudence to be pitted against my emotions (confess- with a bias towards the latter) to arrive at this forgone conclusion that rationalizing my ambitions would be terming myself to be a failure and conclusively compromise my sole purpose of existence.
At no point of time would the crave for extravagance die in me and at no point of time would I accommodate some kind of a bargained low profile settlement with life. Though I do agree that the Ambitions are way too away for my hands to grab and pocket them, but that aint deters me from increasing my capacity.
I shall strive at full capacity for that plush duplex bungalow, that classy car, that casual overnight vacation to ‘Hawaii’ with family!!
I know that I am being unrealistically demanding but the desire for these exorbitances shall keep me going. Not achieving them would mean that I d be declared as a failure but to desert them midway and quit would declare abandonment and signal a defeated self renunciation causing grave indignation.
Hence rationalizing my ambitions stays out of question, they stay alive and in the process keep my purpose of living life very much in contention !!!!
Signing off!!
P.S – Of course, me and my father still need to come to an understanding!!!
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2 comments:
So does that mean that people have dreams precisely because they think they are not achievable? And because they are not achievable, it is the thing that propells the person to work harder and harder, in the bleak hope that it just might come true.
I think people are scared also because they think that if that dream really does come true, then what? what would be the purpose then?
If one sees that dreams are not going to be achievable by the current way of thinking and doing things...one simply needs to change the way one thinks and does!
I have!
It would be hard to generalise this, but from my point of view - you d dream of things that you d always want to achieve but find it beyond ur reach.... for a guy whose everyday choices are forced by monetary constraints - financial independence could in itself be a dream!! and yes dreams evolve over a period of time and so does our perspective in life!!
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